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Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Meditation Journal 12/10/2008

I haven't meditated in a week now.  I haven't done yoga as well.  I am creating new habits for my work day, so I have eliminated the meditation for a week while I get my schedule running smoother. I do meditate on the bus or metro.   I think that this is a part of my transformation.  I am working hard to be a better man for myself. This progress will automatically make me a role-model and inspiration to my boys, wife, and friends.  

I am seeing a change in my thinking process due to mindfulness.  I continue to be mindful of my FEAR.   My fear manifests itself in my "need to control".   To Believe and trust people is difficult for me sometimes, but I am growing my faith overall.  I am also working on my pride and selfishness.  I used pride for a long time as means to falsely exude self confidence and high self esteem.  Pride does not build self- esteem, it mask it. You cannot build your self esteem, if you cannot see your true self.




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